Approaching Women

Here’s a quick summary of a article i read this morning about approaching women, for more information go to

reader’s question

I recently went over to where a waitress was serving, said hi, and told her I was always thinking of her and asked for her phone number. She said: “I don’t give out my number” (I’ve heard that before from waitresses). I did some laughing and a lot of smiling (you weren’t there to kick me). I felt like leaving, but stayed. When I finally was about to leave, I went over to her to say good-bye, and she said: “You would make a nice friend.” Did I do wrong?


David, Carlsbad, CA

david d. responds

I’m going to give it to you straight, because, just by your awesome first name, I can tell that you’re a guy who can take it.

Know what most women think when they’re approached by guys like you?

They start to think to themselves: “What’s the deal with guys like this who fall in love with me after only knowing me for five minutes? This guy must be a loser with no life. I mean, how could he have feelings for me so fast unless he is just a love-sick puppy who needs a new mamma?”

My point is that women are so used to men falling all over themselves that they see it as predictable and completely uninteresting. Worst of all, there’s zero chance of triggering attraction. And without it, you’re dead where you stand.

As a matter of fact, I have a personal theory that I’m working on. I’m starting to think that when a guy sounds needy and desperate, it actually triggers some kind of natural response inside a woman that says: “Avoid this person at all costs.”

Basically, if you meet a great woman, you cannot turn into a clingy, love-struck Wuss who is overcome with the urge to share how he feels.

Take it from me. I used to be one of those guys. And, looking back, I realize now that I had no idea what was going on in most of my interactions with women, and I screwed up so many situations that it’s not even funny.

Well, actually it is pretty funny.

Bottom line: To start understanding women, you need a new way of seeing things. It’s time that you, as a man, started learning more about how women work, what they respond to and how to trigger those powerful feelings of attraction in the women that you desire.

You see, women don’t respond the way they “should” to guys who are “nice.” Instead, women do respond with a powerful attraction to men who create suspense and mystery — to men who seem confident and in control.

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